First of a series
Where DO singles mingle? Some
untraditional places to seek out Mr. or Ms. Right
BY JILL BAUER
As much as we all hate to admit it, our mothers are always
right. When it comes to advice about meeting that special
someone, my mom has often told me that ``it's not the when,
it's the who.''
But if you are single and you live
in South Florida, the first thing you ask yourself is not
''When?'' or ''Who?'' It's ''Where?'' Where's the best place
to meet that better half?
Before setting out to explore all the options in the Magic
City and environs, we called Ian Kerner, renowned sex therapist
and the author of several books on relationships including
Be Honest -- You're Not That Into Him Either. A regular
contributor to Cosmopolitan and Maxim magazines and host of
a weekly Sirius Network call-in radio show on relationships,
Kerner is someone we knew would have some answers.
''My advice for meeting someone is stop focusing on dating
per se and start thinking of ways that you can develop your
sense of self. Take classes, go to wine tastings, go to places
where you can start a conversation that's not reduced to a
pickup line,'' says Kerner.
``Make yourself as busy as possible
so you almost have no time for dating. When people are doing
things to develop themselves they are taken into new venues
and are re-energized and ultimately we are attracted to people
who are energetic and vital and who are expanding themselves.
''I meet so many daters who are stuck
in a rut. Don't put yourself into situations where you are
looking. Put yourself into situations where you can just start
conversations,'' Kerner says.
And with that sage advice, we hit
the road looking for fun in all the right places. And we found
it. All over South Florida.
Here are some atypical yet exceedingly
obvious places where single people, men and women, gay and
straight, hang out just to enjoy themselves. Places that require
little effort and yield some sort of payoff -- even if Mr.
or Ms. Right doesn't immediately appear.
Of course, this list is just a beginning
and is certainly not finite.
For that, dear reader, we rely on
your feedback and suggestions.
HAVE A HAMMER?
Debbie Mandel, author of Turn On Your Inner Light: Fitness
for Body, Mind and Soul, explains the appeal of meeting
at The Home Depot: ``Men are looking for self-reliant women
who can fix things and take some of the responsibility off
them.''
She adds, ''Some weddings have been
celebrated at the Home Depot where the couple originally met.''
Home Depot spokeswoman Sheriee Bowman confirmed this: ``One
Indiana couple wed this year in the parking lot of our Fort
Wayne store in the exact two parking spaces where they met.''
We visited a Home Depot on a recent
Saturday afternoon and spoke to several single customers,
including 40-year-old Wolfgang Arias, a reference trade manager
at Barnes & Noble who lives in Miami Shores.
''I take salsa lessons to meet women,''
he said, ``but I come here all the time and it would be nice
to meet a woman at Home Depot.''
If you've run out of home improvement
tasks and need an excuse to be there, check out the website
(www.homedepot.com)
for weekend do-it-yourself clinic schedules.
THE WRITE ONE
There is literally -- and literarily -- something for everyone
at Books & Books' three South Florida stories. We highly
recommend stopping by for free live music on Friday nights
in the courtyard of the Coral Gables store and Wednesday nights
at the Lincoln Road location in Miami Beach. ''When you're
meeting someone in a bookstore it allows for a conversation
to go in directions where you can learn a lot about each other.
It's a conversation about the world of ideas,'' said Books
& Books owner Mitchell Kaplan. ``I remember a while back
there was some chick lit author speaking at the store and
like 45 women showed up and only two guys. The guys were there
because they knew it'd be an event attended by women.''
For a list of events, visit www.booksandbooks.com
or call 305-442-4408.
Too far to drive?
Word has it that the bookstore to frequent in Broward County
is the Barnes & Noble at 2051 N. Federal Hwy. in Fort
Lauderdale. Especially popular are Open Mike Poetry night,
at 7:30 p.m. the second Monday of every month, and the Gay
& Lesbian Reading Group at 7:30 p.m. the first Tuesday.
''There's a lot of interaction here,'' says Barnes & Noble
spokeswoman Helen LaForge. ''This is a happening place.''
For information on events: 954-561-3732 or www.bn.com.
GET FRESH
Hey, they don't call it a supermarket for nothing. When we
asked South Floridians about great meeting places, Publix
was a unanimous favorite. And according to Publix spokeswoman
Anne Hendrix, there is always something going on at one of
the 240 stores, whether it's a wine tasting or a holiday festival.
''Also, don't forget Dolphins season,''
Hendrix said. ``Sunday morning is the tailgater crowd and
you can't miss them. They're all dressed up and are excited
about the game and they have something to talk to each other
about.''
APPLE OF YOUR EYE
Word -- or should we say, WordPerfect -- has it that the Apple
Store is the new place to meet people. With daily workshops
on everything from Podcasting to Getting Started on your Mac,
the stores -- on Lincoln Road, at The Falls and in Aventura
-- are drawing huge crowds.
We visited the Aventura store on a
Sunday afternoon and the Lincoln Road store on a Friday night
and both were bustling. People were definitely checking each
other out -- and maybe even clicking. For workshop information:
www.apple.com.
ROW, ROW YOUR BOAT
All levels of rowing are taught by the Miami Beach Rowing
Club at the Ronald W. Shane Rowing Center, and there's an
equal mix of male and female members. As Elaine Roden, the
center's executive director said, ``There's always flirting
here. People are walking around half naked.''
The center has events where men and
women row together and club members often congregate for barbecues.
In the fall the club is adding full moon kayaking tours. For
information: www.rowmiamibeach.com
or 305-861-8876.
NETWORKING GROUPS
Networking Groups such as YUPRO (Young Uprising Professionals
Referral Organization) are popping up all over town. Although
YUPRO, a group made up of young entrepreneurs, does not bill
itself as a singles organization, 90 percent of its members
are single.
We caught up with the participants
at one of their recent gatherings at Lucky Strike bowling
alley in Miami Beach -- yet another great place to strike
up a conversation -- and found a well-rounded group of intelligent
professionals, ages 27-38.
''Quality yields quality and there's
an instant bond here. We're all professionals and we have
a lot in common. And your married friends view the world differently,''
said YUPRO member Will Springer, a 34-year-old account executive.
Contact Rachelle Ginsberg at rachelle@usacommercial-residential.com.
PUPPY LOVE
Too long a paws between relationships? Maybe it's time to
leash up Fido and stop by China Grill's Dogs Gone Wild event
from 5 to 10 p.m. every Sunday. ''Our entire patio is dog-friendly,''
said general manager Steven Haas. ``There's a puppy lounge
for those who don't want to eat dinner, and there's a puppy
park where the dogs have a baby-sitter.''
The Dogs Gone Wild for Singles event
has gotten popular enough for the Today Show to tape recent
festivities. Info: www.chinagrillmgt.com
or 305-534-2211. Address: 404 Washington Ave., Miami Beach.
HEAD OVER HEELS
For those who think there aren't enough smarties in our midst,
check out Miami's Mensa chapter, which boasts a membership
of 300 and often schedules social gatherings. According to
Mensa's national website, ``there have been many marriages
made at Mensa.''
Chapter president Liz Hernandez said
that people are welcome to attend up to three meetings before
taking the IQ test. And lest you think Mensa doesn't attract
a cool enough crowd, note that Geena Davis and Steve Martin
are just two of Mensa's many famous members.
For a wild and crazy time -- and information
on testing and social activities -- contact Bob Lessne at
305-271-0012 or check out www.miami.us.mensa.org
or broward.us.mensa.org/
CAN'T BE BEAT
If you have to choose one place to be on a Friday night, try
salsa lessons at Salsa Mia (at Yuca Lounge) on Lincoln Road
in Miami Beach. With a relaxed lounge atmosphere and a welcoming
staff, it's impossible not to feel at home here -- whether
you have two left feet or can shake your bon-bon with abandon.
''I think this is fantastic,'' said
27-year-old Juan David who was there for first time. ``I've
been looking for an atmosphere like this. . . . Everybody's
like a family. You can see and feel the energy.''
You don't need to bring a partner,
and gay participants can learn both the leader and follower
role, says owner Susan Fisher. Information: www.salsamia.com
or 305-987-3033.
HOT TICKET
Looking for a picture perfect romance? This combination movie
theater-bar-pool hall-live music venue could be the place
to find your very own matinee idol. Open since April, Cinebar
at Sunrise Cinemas at Las Olas Riverfront is the only movie
theater chain in Broward County that serves beer and wine
that moviegoers can bring into the theater.
''A lot of single people congregate here on the weekends,''
said manager Mike Eder.
``People sit around and listen to
music and have a few drinks and it's a calmer atmosphere than
going to clubs.''
And listen up, Dolphins: Beginning
Sept. 17 you can watch the game on the big screen in one of
the 15 state-of-the-art auditoriums. The theater is at 300
SW First Ave., Fort Lauderdale. Information: 954-761-9400
or www.sunrisecinemas.com.
Next: Meeting and greetings at cultural and charity events
© 2006 MiamiHerald.com and wire service
sources. All Rights Reserved.
http://www.miami.com
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